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Career

Honesty, Culture, and the Clash with Leadership

September 3, 2016
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I recently read a post on WP Tavern (one of my fav WP blogs to read) that brought up the question of the “us vs. them” mentality. And then I read another blog post that was a reaction to the original post.  And it got me thinking…but not about WordPress core leadership. To be completely honest with you, I’m not as involved in WordPress contributions as I’d like to be, but that is my fault and mine alone. However, it did make me contemplate leadership in general. It seems like we are seeing a rise in the toxic leader and employees that clash with leadership are finding new companies.

Lately, I’ve been starting a lot of my sentences with the words “to be completely honest with you..” as if I’m trying to get a point across that merits truthfulness. When, realistically, I try to be as honest as I can be when speaking about things like work and the environment we collaborate in. Yes…as honest as I can be…and that thought, that thought right there (you had it too, didn’t you!?), that thought makes me pause. I want to uncover that thought because it’s one that we don’t talk about. And it’s universal across all businesses, all industries.

That thought of being honest…

This is a really hard concept to capture, comprehend, and bring to light…because, let’s face it, we hold back. Quite. A. Lot. And to a certain extent, we have to. We are all professionals in a professional world, yet we don’t think that way about some of the people we interact with. I think we’ve all been in these situations where we’re casually talking with a new colleague when they ask the question “so, what should I know about our CEO?” Maybe they ask “what are your thoughts on the way she handled that meeting?” We all want to be honest with a new coworker about the flaws of our bosses or how we think our manager handled that last working session, but we hold back when they ask.

Then there’s being honest with your CEO or boss. Should you have to worry about whether or not you’re going to get fired for bringing up an issue at work. Or should you have to feel scared of retribution from a manager, director, or the CEO of your company for doing something you feel is right? Probably not, but it happens all the time. It happens because there’s usually a lack of communication in the hierarchy of an organization.  Or the organization itself breeds dishonesty. But what’s the one thing that affects communication more than anything else? Behavior.

“People leave managers, not companies.”

I forget who said it, but people leave their manager, not their company. For the most part, I believe this to be true. You have probably left a company because you lack faith in your leadership or are at odds with them. Leaders come in different shapes and sizes. There’s no leadership school that you can send someone to to receive leadership training. Well, I guess there are leadership seminars and whatnot. But it’s a trait that a). people are born with, or b). (and more likely) people develop over time, or c). (most likely) people are committed to improving through team feedback, lessons learned, and the will to lead in a better capacity.

In my opinion, trust (or lack there of) in your leadership really comes down to behavior. Now everyone says it would be healthier to bring up your grievances, but whether or not team members actually do this is a reflection of how comfortable they feel with leadership and their behavior. How can employees feel comfortable airing their issues if their leadership is known for explosive behavior? On the flipside to that, if your leadership is known for not having explosive behavior, but more passive aggressive behavior, I ask again—how can employees feel comfortable airing their issues? My career has spanned many industries, and I’ve come in contact with many leaders, some good, some bad, and very few who have been phenomenal! It’s the leaders that instill a judgment-free, open-door, challenging environment that enables teams to shine. And the leaders that don’t, usually see a high turnover rate.

Behavior begets behavior…

Behavior plays such a huge role in leadership skills. I’m sure we’ve all had that Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde boss that we’re frightened to go to because we’re not sure what reaction we’ll get from them. That’s setting a tone for the entire company to not raise future issues. We’ve also probably all had the passive aggressive boss that shuts you out after a remark is made or an idea is mentioned that wasn’t well-received, and you end up getting the silent treatment for two weeks. Employees will feel like speaking up isn’t worth the effort or retribution.

Behavior begets behavior, and it starts at the top. What do I mean by that? Well, a company, agency, or startup, is usually a reflection of the leadership. If a CEO is transparent with his employees, they’ll most likely be transparent with the CEO. When a Director of Marketing is an innovative leader, her team will most likely become innovative themselves. If a manager wants their team members to go to networking events, then that manager should be going to them as well.  Employees will usually mirror the behavior they see leadership display. We’ve all heard the term “lead by example.”

A company culture will be defined by the behavior leadership teams exhibit. And without the support of leadership, then a company’s culture has no chance of actually changing for the better. Good staff don’t want to work in a company that breeds a culture of fear or mediocrity.

Ethics also play a big role…

I have a moral code that I live by, as I’m sure you do too. Companies have the same thing, they call them values. But I think some companies have values just for the sake of having values. Without standards that can help measure the commitment one has toward their values, then they’re just a punchline.

I’ve been involved in the retail, sales, construction, and technology industries. They all have a mixed bag of people who want to do the right thing, those that seem like they don’t care, and the others that are balancing between ethics and cutting corners. Individuals have ethics, groups have ethics, and at times they can be at odds. They can also be a glaring example of a leader’s backbone. Leaders need to be held to a higher ethical standard because interpretations are dependent on those they lead. And too many times do we see leaders’ actions as “do as I say, not as I do” hypocrisy that begins to creep into an entire organization.

Finding that right mix…

What happens when you’re odds with your leadership? Or what happens when you can’t be honest with them? You start to hate your job, and essentially your life. No one wants to compromise their ethics for getting better results (or what may seem like better results) at work. But people do it. No one wants to be dishonest with their coworkers about the behavior of their CEO. But we do it. And we rationalize why. “Oh, I really need this job.” “The benefits are good, and it’s something I can tolerate for now.” Your inner self is screaming at you to leave now!!! And maybe you should.

Why do you think there are so many freelancers out there? How many times have you heard someone say “I’m going to open up my own business because I can do this better?” Many, I’m sure. But if you don’t want to be a freelancer or business owner, then what are your options? Finding that right mix of industry, coworkers, and leadership that’ll challenge you and make you feel at home.

Thriving with collaboration and innovation

Seek out industries you have a passion for. Seek out companies and other individuals that have similar values and standards. Check out Glassdoor Best Places to Work, GreatPlacesToWork.com, or any other rating site. When you find a company that looks good, check them out, check out their products, their reviews, their case studies, testimonials, etc. Talk with employees and former employees. Seek out the companies that are accomplishing things you’d want to accomplish too.

Bring your moral code to the team, bring your values and standards along too. When you start at a new company, bring your innovation, collaborate with team members in an open and honest way. If you can show your energy and enthusiasm, you’ll most likely attract those with the same energy and enthusiasm. Getting into a company where leaders openly challenge you to do your best work the right way is rare. When you find that place, it’s a place to stay.

I just started at a new company and so far, they’re super collaborative, innovative, and transparent. But I also have the added value of working with a leader I trust from years ago, so that’s a plus. Our portfolio is huge, we work with some really cool technology, and we have a global team. I’m looking forward to this next chapter and the team I’m doing it with. But what if you’re in a different position than me?

Co-existing with leaders you don’t necessarily agree with…

This has always been hard for me, even after I air my grievances with a leader. But if you’re in the throes of a shitty situation at work that stems from your lack of faith in your leadership, here are a few options:

  1. Confront your leader — I know that this might be a hard pill to swallow, but facing the situation head on is the quickest route to understanding if something’s fixable or not. If it’s fixable, awesome. If not, then maybe it’s time to move on.
  2. Work more with your leader — If you work closely with your leader, it’ll lead to a few things. A better understanding of each others’ roles. You can see how they treat other workers. And hopefully you can find common ground.
  3. Focus on things you can control — If you don’t get along with a leader, then focus your attention on your work and doing it really, really well. Producing great results will set you a part.
  4. Maybe it’s time to find something else — If you’ve exhausted all other possibilities, then maybe it is time to leave. And there is no shame in that.

I’m positive that we’ve all been there. Working with leaders you can’t trust, can’t be honest with, or don’t agree with can make work a negative experience. Remember to hold on to your ethics and standards. and as long as you can be honest in a tactful and constructive way, you should be able to make your situation better, or find a better situation.

Revised Listserve… and the Hamster Wheel

June 18, 2016
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It is not true that people stop pursuing dreams because they grow old, they grow old because they stop pursuing dreams.

I wrote a post a while ago on what I would write if I won the listserve. It’s a cool community of about 25,000 people, all over the world, who are on an email list. Every single day a new winner emerges and gets to write a single email to the ever-growing subscriber list. That email can say whatever you want it to say, you can write and inform and inspire and vent and reminisce as long as you don’t add any links of any kind. So, no links to your business or website or blog or whatever, but you can promote yourself or your music or your art or your creativity or whatever, any way you’d like.

Communities that captivate…

I’ve been an avid member of this community for over a year now, I’ve never won…..bummer. Yet there is still hope that I will one day have my time in the spotlight to speak to the other members of this community.

The Listserve in textI’ve been captivated by people’s willingness to share their lives, it’s as breathtaking as it is depressing. And I mean that in a way that connotes true deep sadness from my own life. Because…. I think I’ve forgotten the meaning of my own life. People talk about certain moments in their life that changed them, parents discuss their child being transgender, or how saving the life of a stranger morphed them, or how their job could either help or destroy a life, or a high-schooler contemplating his options for college and how it’s such a dramatic decision. People take these moments, they take their lives, and they need to attach a meaning to it, because meaning is what we are all here for.

We all have meaning…it’s the reason we do things we don’t necessarily want to do.

We all have meaning (or at least I hope we do), it’s the reason we get up in the morning, it’s the reason we do things we don’t necessarily want to do. But without that meaning, life is lost. I feel as we grow older, that meaning changes into something we didn’t necessarily mean it to change into. I get that dreams fade, or disappear, or you tell yourself you’re an adult now, so your dream of being an artist has just got to be a hobby. And that’s ok, except for when you resign yourself to the fact that “this is it” — that’s a horrible place to be.

People say get a job you love, and you’ll never work a day in your life. But as most of us know, that’s hard to do. If you had millions of dollars and never had to work another day in your life, what would you spend your time doing?

The heartbreak that I feel sometimes and this dysphoria inside makes me gaze back on my previous years, the ones that are long behind me, yet still dance around my mind like party-goers on a mischievous night. I’ve had moments too that change me. Moments that add meaning to my life. Moments that are so meaningful you segment your life into two sections: before this moment, and after it.

It makes me want to search again, to find anything that’s meaningful, to feel anything that isn’t the numbness of my everyday life. But I’m here, writing this post, instead of out there, trying to live.

inspiring sunset over an island ocean
Random Sunset Image
Hopefully that cheered you up from my depressing rant!

I glimpse inward and realize that my life has come to a cross-roads…as many lives do over the course of a natural life-span. I am not close to where I want to be. I am living on the edge of a precipice that is miles outside the inner warmth of my most prized possession—my happiness. And I believe I’m not alone.

Technology and its correlation to our lives…

I recently wrote a post on the affects of technology in our culture and I’ve briefly searched the internet to find a lot more on the subject: We are not obligated to build our lives around technology and Technology is changing how we live, but it needs to change how we work. And the list goes on and on… The point to make here is that many of us, and I do mean many, use technology as their crutch or their excuse. I know I do. To not live a life that you truly want. It’s gotten so easy to be distracted by technology, and work, and emails, and Facebook, that I have to wonder to myself if we’re all really living anymore. And I think there’s a direct correlation to people’s (I don’t want to called it unhappiness, but..) uneasiness of their current situations. Many people live to work, right? Find a good job, find a career, get married, have kids, stability, savings, retirement….oh retirement, now I can pursue the things I want?? I know people say “well…that’s just life..” but I ask — “does it have to be?

Sustainable living versus the hamster wheel of life

I recently started looking into articles about people living off the grid. I know, we’ve all heard that term, and do we really understand what it means? Well, off the grid means you live a sustainable life, which means if something happened to the city water supply or electricity went down for an entire county, you’d be comfortable! I found this article about the off-the-grid guy and how he went from paying thousands and thousands of dollars every year on things like sewage, water, and electricity to paying only $300 per year in bills, that’s pretty awesome! If you want to read his story, check it out – http://www.vice.com/read/a-guy-whos-been-living-off-the-grid-for-20-years-how-i-can-live-more-sustainably

And he’s not the only one who’s done this, there have been others. And now what we’re seeing is that “living off the grid” is being banned in certain areas. That’s right, parts of Canada and the U.S. are now banning living off the grid. Which seems really crappy to me. Because if you take the guy who “lives off the grid” and see what he was paying for bills every year, and what he now pays, that’s a significant decrease. Yet people trying to be sustainable and leave a smaller carbon footprint on the earth, are being banned to do so. Why is that?

I don’t want to call it conspiracy, but we live in a hamster wheel most days. Get a job, buy a house, workCartoon business guy running on a hamster wheel to pay off that house (it’ll only take you a lifetime!), spend money to live in that house on extras like water, electricity, cable, garbage disposal, lawn treatments, repairs, and the list goes on. And this is why humans work constantly, to pay for the American dream that really doesn’t feel like a dream anymore. It feels like a trap.

So….what IS important? I guess my guess is as a good as yours. What’s important to me? I mean, when I really sit down and think about it? My relationships. With my family, my friends, the people I’ve connected with over the years. The things I’m passionate about are important to me like music and writing. The dreams I still have that I won’t let die. I’m also really interested in technology, that’s why I blog about it and work in it. But I can’t use it as a crutch anymore, it needs to be used thoughtfully and not all the time. Otherwise, I feel like my life will just pass by and the days of feeling like I’m really living will be over. I don’t want that, I don’t think anyone does.

And just to be clear, I’m not telling anyone they need to live off the grid or not be on the computer as much. What I’m saying is this… when the road ends for you and you look back on your life, what regrets will you have? What will you wish you would have done? Do that thing….NOW!!!

The Mercy of the Tides

April 5, 2016
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We’re all just ships at the mercy of the tides.

Are we?

I look back on my life, how its stride has quickened and its step increases the older I grow. Yet, do I continue to grow or just exist – with my good job, my city apartment, and my insecurities. A question I seem to be asking myself a lot lately, am I living the life I want?

The short answer, is no. The longer answer isn’t that simple…obviously.

I recently moved back to my home town because of my ability to work wherever there is wifi. I moved all my stuff back down into my parent’s basement cluttering their life with my weighty and burdensome possessions. Stuff I like to call stuff. Stuff I know I don’t need, but hold onto anyway. Why, as a people, are we tethered to goods and objects? I believe it’s because we feel like we’re made of substance when we are surrounded by substance, but it’s mock substance, not real palpable, absolute substance that stems from your passion, your desire.

Last weekend, I saw an old high school friend who I hadn’t seen in close to 15 years. She knew me a long time ago when I was…well, when I wasn’t what I am now. Which is a success story (her words!). But after I thought about it, she’s right, I am a success. In my early twenties after the whole “rock star” dream didn’t come to fruition, I went into somewhat of a downward spiral, drinking a lot, and feeling sorry for myself.

I got my life back on track and worked in a number of different industries including sales, construction, and tech. I fell in love, then out of it. I went to college, didn’t graduate, but I went and learned. Wandered until I found a place I thought I belonged. I like being in Providence, the city is ripe with authenticity, she’s quirky and cool, and walking down Westminster will always cheer me up.

Today, I am on my way to Austin for a tech conference (WOOConference to be exact!) and I’m really looking forward to it! I love events. I like my job, a lot! I make good money, I can work anywhere, I’ve met amazing people over the last few years, and for those of you who know me from the old days – I am definitely a success story. But I’m not so sure I feel like one—and here’s why:

  1. Work – I work an obscene amount of hours. On average I work about 65-70 hours per week. Which, in this day in age, is getting to be the norm. And when I’m done with my day, my head aches and all I want to do is veg.
  2. Stress – the amount of stress you incur working for a fast-paced tech company is demanding. It’s in the air, it’s always there. I’ve learned to recognize it and deal with it, but it can still be hard.
  3. Always on – this means that being in sales at a global tech company you are always on. I go to events a lot (which is cool), but I’m always on. Always talking with someone, always getting an answer for someone, emailing, texting, skyping, slacking, and on and on.
  4. Time – it flies by, literally so fast and I can never get that time back. Which saddens me, I used to be good at time management when my time wasn’t so limited (lol!), but now that my time is spread thin, I need to rework where I allocate my time. This is the world’s (and your life’s) greatest commodity.
  5. Sleep – I’ll wake up in the middle of the night wondering if I sent that email or signed a proposal. My brain operates 24/7 and that’s just a part of the job.

But I don’t want to sound like I’m complaining, believe me, I am not. Because here are all the pro’s of being successful.

  1. Accomplishment – I feel really good about myself. I look at the things I’ve learned in a short amount of time and I’m amazed. The fact that my brain has the capacity to compute all this shit is pretty cool.
  2. Stability – ahhh..this is one I have never really had in my entire life. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’ve lived on my own before and survived in two of the toughest cities in North America, but what I have now is real stability. I have a portfolio, 401k, I think about retirement, hahaha. If you knew me, this is laughable, sincerely, and in a good way!
  3. Freedom – Because I have money now, I have more freedom. And we all know that money doesn’t buy happiness, but it can alleviate some of the issues you’re facing and it’s nice to not have to live paycheck to paycheck anymore.
  4. Networking – I meet a lot of people. People on the entire spectrum from CEO’s to sales guys, to strategist to founders. I’ve made friends and I have mentors.
  5. Reputation – I’ve done pretty well in my career so far and have gained a reputation as a solid, truthful biz dev guy. This means a lot to me because I have principles and like to know that they’re noticed.

So, you take the good with the bad. When I worked construction, my body ached, I was dirty and smelled pretty bad when I got home, but I had time to play my guitar, I had time to hang out with my friends. Now, things are limited. However, lately I’ve been taking 10 minute breaks throughout the day to get in a small jam session, it feels incredible!

But where do we go from here? My sister wants to start a business and I’m down for that, but where am I going to find the time? I really have to budget more time to getting the things I want to do done. And that’s the hard part. Do  I get less sleep? Maybe, but I’ll be honest, I don’t get that much sleep anyway!

So, are we at the mercy of the tides?

I don’t know, I think I am right now, but every single day I get a little better at allocating my time, for me. Not allowing nonsense to fill up in my reserves and run on empty. Balance the workload with the lifeload. Because, honestly, I want more. I deserve more, like we all do. Whether that means to be my own boss, or just play solo acoustic shows on the Connecticut shoreline once a month, I’m not sure. But I do know that if I don’t get behind the wheel of the ship, I won’t be able to steer it in the direction I need to go. The direction I want and have to go in. It’s the way to my life, that thing I’ll look back on and call extraordinary.

 

Career Moves and Climbing up the Tech Tower

January 28, 2016
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It’s an interesting thing to look back on one’s life. The places you’ve been, the people you’ve met, skills you’ve learned, jobs you’ve loved or loathed, and the experiences that etch the fabric which falls softly around your character, warming it or making it cold.

I can’t specifically say when I think my life started. I guess it started when I was born, but I don’t remember that. As time progresses, I’ve become less concerned with where I’m going because I realize the journey is the important part. That’s not to say that I don’t have an end goal, but how’s the saying go?

It’s good to have an end to journey towards, but it is the journey that matters in the end.

So now I think more about chapters. You close one, another one opens. Or maybe my life is more like vignettes or episodes.

I wanted to write this post for a few different reasons.

  1. Career moves — I’ve made one!
  2. Mentorship is key to success
  3.  Becoming an expert

Career Moves

As most of you may know, I’ve worked for Oomph for almost two years. Awesome agency, super smart people, quality work, great clients. Quite frankly, Oomph was the best (and most rewarding) career choice I’ve ever made. It poured great buckets of knowledge through my ever absorptive and permeable mind. I’d like to take a quick moment to say ‘thanks’ — it’s been super fun!

But as the tides of tech roll on and the call of career maturation bellows, I’ve taken an offer from an awesome website security company aptly named Sucuri (pronounced Sue—coo—ree, with kind of a rolling rrrr sound; the more widely known pronunciation is Suh—cure—ee), I will be starting next week. Sucuri is distributed (which means I can work wherever there is wifi, hello Costa Rica!), they have incredibly great products, are well-known in the open source technology space, and I’m super excited about meeting and getting to know the rest of the team.

Career moves might be hard sometimes, but they’re important. The level of growth that comes with each new company (or position) gets you that much closer to your end-game. Which you may not even have a clue what that is yet. But the more you learn, the more you know and the more you do, then the more you become.

And in tech, if you’re not growing, you’re stagnant. This is an environment that continually changes, don’t be afraid to change with it.

A wise man once told me that there are two things you take with you when you leave a job. 1). are the skills you’ve learned and 2). are the references you’ve made. References can be as important as skills because connections matter, in any business.

Mentorship

Mentorship is one of those things that kind of happens organically. You get to know your coworkers and other people in the tech space. Sidenote: the tech space can be very intertwined. You’ll continue to see the same people at the same events year after year—so make good impressions.

Why?

Because mentorship is vital to success. When you get to know people and you click with someone, they’ll guide you through the sometimes hostile world of business and you’ll learn real actionable items from your mentors. This means everything for your career development as well as helps your personal growth. I’ve been legitimately lucky that I have certain people who are undoubtedly invested in my success. Which I think can be very different in other industries like construction or boiler-room sales. But I have a handful of experienced mentors that I can turn to for sage advice.

It’s nice to be able to call on people who are much more versed and qualified in certain areas to get good answers, vent when I need to, help me make a connection I might not be able to make myself, and bounce ideas and goals off of.

Again, I’m lucky to have a few in my corner who have distinct and divergent areas of expertise. It makes you a little rounder, a little more informed, and enlightens. Seek a mentor, and if you’re already awesome at what you do, then be one for someone else.

Becoming an expert

I had the pleasure of sitting down with Jason Pamental who works for Fresh Tilled Soil. He also wrote a book on Responsive Typography and is considered to be a leading expert in web typography. He gives many talks around the world on the subject and leads workshops to help other designers, developers, and strategists understand this niche area of design and technology. Not to add more credentials to his curriculum vitae, but he’s an accomplished author and writes for a number of publications.

When we sat down for lunch at the FTS offices (which are the coolest offices I’ve ever seen, btw!), we talked about expertise in tech and design. I’m going to paraphrase, but Jason’s journey started some 20 years ago (I know, I have a long ways to go!) and he got into typography because a). he liked it and b). there weren’t many people into it at the time he started. Typography had been a little overlooked in the web world.

But he started reading a lot about print typography and hanging out with people in that world soaking in everything he could. After a while he started speaking about it on a small scale. Before long, organizations and institutions were asking him to speak on it on a much larger scale. Of course if you ask Jason, he’ll say he’s still learning! But the important thing is to find something that you’re really into.

So what am I really into in the tech world?

The cool thing is that there’s so much I can do, but I’m at a point now where I have to start narrowing it down. Like the college kid nearing the end of his second year and still hasn’t chosen a major. I’m good at sales, have a proven track record, but I’m not sure if I’ll always want to do it. I like what I did at Oomph, the creative freedom to craft proposals and put presentations together. I think I’m going to like what I do at Sucuri, because when it comes down to it, I like solving peoples’ problems. There’s strategy in that, and it’s challenging. And I think I’d like to learn more about that, the strategy side. There will always be sales in my DNA. I’ve given talks on solutions consulting and more recently I was the guest speaker on the Talking Drupal podcast this week. I’ll post that when it’s available.

In closing

I feel I’m on the right path and this decision to leave Oomph (which was not decided lightly) was the right one to make. I’ll keep on climbing up the tech tower and hopefully one day I’ll look back and say “wow—what a view?”

Morning time, theListserve, Work, and Dan Rather

August 7, 2015
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As I sit here listening to alt-j (Nara is an awesome song), it’s early in the morning and I’m the only one in the office. I like this time, mostly to talk to myself about upcoming presentations or how to articulate our value a little better when I talk to prospects. But I love this time too, morning time. It’s quiet, except for the music, but it’s peaceful. There’s a calm about me and I can’t express into words the feeling that just sweeps over me sometimes, I feel connected, loved even.

I joined a community called thelistserve, it’s kinda like the lottery. But instead of winning money, you win an email, one email. And you can say whatever you want, you just can’t link to anything in the email. It goes out to the 30,000 people who are a part of this community. All the emails I’ve read from others have been extremely positive. People looking to help others, either through what they do or who they are. A personal tragedy brought to light, a haiku style rant, a plug about your company or music, it’s a really cool community. If anyone wants to be a part of a growing community, join up and maybe one day you’ll be able to send an email to all the people on the Listserve.

Balance is everything

I also wanted to touch on work (I know, I know). I haven’t posted anything in a really long time and I’m sorry, I’ve been super duper busy! It’s an ongoing battle to consistently get my work done, but still save time for myself and doing the things that I want to do. I am losing this battle, work has been winning. And maybe as I put this down on paper (or a WYSIWYG) I’ll hold myself to keeping myself in check. I need that balance, we all do. Or at the end of our lives, we’ll look back and weep for not doing the things we wanted to do. Now, I’m all for learning new things at your job/career, but you have to sprinkle in “fun” time. It’s the only way to continue to do what you/we do, and do it well.

Go do something fun, NOW!!!!

Find the time to be weird

I’m weird, super weird, and those who know me, know that. I’m human and I’m weird…..that’s okay, trust me, it is OK!! We all have our quirks, embrace them. So what if I talk to myself. People around the office know this about me and they’re cool with it. They might laugh behind my back, but that’s ok. If you like to eat peanut butter and egg salad sandwiches, eat up. If you’re a secret Rebecca Black lover, sing that shit at the top of your lungs. If you have a natural aptitude for krumping, thug out! It’s okay, seriously, we’ll like you more! Weirdness is ——- COOL

Embrace it and own it!!

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Now for one final note, ever since I’ve been a part of the listserve, I’ve felt connected again to something bigger. I was born and raised Catholic (and yes, I’m still recovering from that), but when I was a kid I prayed all the time. To me, God was Dan Rather in a white robe standing in the clouds looking down on me, and I prayed to him. Somewhere in high school I lost my faith, did some stupid things (that teenagers do) and didn’t think about religion for years. Coming full circle, I have found my faith again, but I don’t believe in God in the traditional sense, I believe in connection to all other living things, that’s God. This is why I’m able to empathize and feel someone’s pain or suffering. This is why when a stranger is wildly laughing walking down the street, I laugh too. And why tragedies (like the recent airplane crashes) greatly affect me and my state of being, I cry because their loss, is my loss, it’s our loss, because we are all together. And that’s good, it’s great in fact, for we are here together, and for generations to come, we will always be connected to them. We feel what everyone feels and I’ve seen more and more acts of kindness and good for me not to believe there’s something bigger.

My view this morning:

It’s a cloudy day, but it’s beautiful. The possibilities today are endless for me, and for you, for us!! Let’s make today special, maybe we’ll meet each other on the train, or see each other sitting in a coffeeshop. If that happens, say hello, I won’t hesitate to ask how your special day is going. Just think, something miraculous is going to happen to YOU today, something great and wonderful and unexpected. But make sure your eyes are opened, because it can happen in the blink of an eye. Remember, if it happens to you, it happens to me and I’ll cherish that moment we share together!

Everyone, have a wonderful day, it’s only the beginning and wherever you are – there’s the entry point.

Work/Life Balance

November 8, 2014
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As I sit here on a Saturday morning totally neglecting my life/fun/relationships/and other commitments, it makes sense to quickly talk about work/life balance, of which I have none of!!

Life

Ok, so this is pretty straightforward, right? You should only be working 40 hours (yeah, right) a week, or so that’s what the American government says is fair. Which, I do work 40 hours a week, I just also tack on about another 20 or so hours for events, and meetups, traveling from office to office. I enjoy it, but others in my life tell me it’s always going to be like that unless you find a balance. So, I’m trying to find a balance. And how do I do that? I go back to why I first got into this tech game, to code. I’m starting to learn the command line once again! I haven’t had much time to continue to code ever since my job took ahold of me. But what I’ve learned over the last few years is that I like being in front of my computer. I have a number of digital properties that need my attention and require that I spend some time on it. My idea of adventure (nowadays) is learning, that’s my exploration!

Work

This is where it gets tricky. You want to perform, you want to make things happen for the company you work for, but where do you draw the line between what you do for them and what you do for yourself? I think this answer is pretty simple. When you’re on the clock, you’re on the clock. That time is what you’re getting paid for and for 40 hours a week, it belongs to your company. The other time spent working is not only for your company, but also for you. Network with other companies, get a sense of what’s out there and how you could fit into the landscape as a whole. Think about your career and not your job. Don’t think about that next promotion or title you could get, think about what makes you really happy and healthy in a work environment. Is it running around all over the place and talking with people to try and sell them your company or is it sitting behind a computer and conquering the world of programming languages. What do you want to do??

You

This is where you should focus your time. Do things that further and better your own life. Because in all honesty, life is about you, your life. Not anyone else’s. Not your family’s, not your company’s – yours, and yours alone! At the end of the day, at the end of your life, you’ll look back and thank yourself for following the path you wanted to. Not what someone else wanted you to follow. Be bold, be brave, be you!